So, yesterday I woke up with chest pain and basically non-stop skip beats. If you read my recent post, I have been struggling a lot with health anxiety lately so this incident just put me over the edge. I debated going to the ER, but logically knew it was unlikely to be anything serious (knowing my anxiety has made me feel similar ways in the past). So, I went to my family doctor and guess what?
We went through all the basics – a temporary heart monitor, doctor listened to my breathing and heart from every angle possible, checked my blood pressure, and topped it all off with one of the longest ECGs of my life (I have an irregular heart rhythm, so I have had LOTS of ECGs).
After all that, I was fine. Nothing wrong. ECG was totally normal (well, normal for me given my already abnormal rhythm!) Blood pressure was good. Heart and lungs sounded fine.
“It’s stress,” my doctor said.
What a surprise. Though it turned out that nothing was wrong, I am still worried. Because this is what stress does. Stress sucks, and it can cause REAL problems. I have been stressed 24/7 for most of my life. And that is not an exaggeration. For almost my ENTIRE life, I have had at least one panic attack per day. Per. Day.
I guess this was sort of a wake up call again, because even when I think I am “functioning okay” I still have severe anxiety. Right now I am extra stressed because of the whole buying a house for the first time thing, but even on regular days, I am stressed.
I’m thinking about trying medication again. I don’t really know what else to do, and I’m tired of letting my mental illness rule my life.