Dating After Marriage


For some reason, it seems our society believes that once you get married, all the fun is over. For Jeff and I, I think we’re actually having so much more fun now that we’re married. But we have noticed one thing. Dating has gotten hard

When you first meet someone, dating is super easy because…what else are you supposed to do? And then once you’ve been together for a while, sometimes the dates turn into sitting around watching Netflix all day, but when you drive an hour to see each other like Jeff and I did until we got married, we usually wanted to make the best of that time together. So, we went on lost of dates.

And then we got married.

It’s been almost exactly three months since our wedding day, and we’ve probably gone on almost exactly three dates since then. I’m probably exaggerating a little bit, but as soon as we got married, finding the time to go on dates was so much harder. Because we had to pay for them with the little budget we had. Because we realized that the grocery bill was more important than a day at the zoo. Because it was a lot easier to stay in our sweatpants all day, pig out on Twizzlers, and watch Disney movies until our eyes hurt than go out. Because we were together all the time already, so was a date even special anymore?

And yeah, sometimes those things are fun. And sometimes, those things are better than going out. But I think we’ve realized the importance of dating. Today, Jeff set up an awesome date for the two of us. He completely took control and took me out for the most fun I’ve had all summer. First, we drove downtown and went to our local aquarium. After that, we had lunch at a fancy restaurant downtown. Around 2:30, we headed back to our suburban area and wrote silly stories for each other in Starbucks. Then we went on an hour long walk and had dinner and dessert at my parents house! Overall, it was a great day. And we really needed it. We were feeling a bit stuck, and an exciting day to ourselves is exactly what our relationship needed.

Our delicious antipasto plate at the most adorable restaurant downtown!
Our delicious antipasto plate at the most adorable restaurant downtown

Today, we learned that dates are still special after marriage. Dates are still important after marriage. Marriage isn’t the time to give up on dating. Those times we have alone together, NOT in our basement apartment, NOT volunteering together, NOT doing homework together are very important times to connect and love each other.

Because even after you’re married, you should still be furiously pursuing your spouse. 

I’m sure there will be times in the future where we will forget the importance of dating. Where we will once again fall into the monotonous routines of daily life. And then we’ll remember how important it is once again, because we’ll be feeling stuck in a rut.

But for now, for today at least, we are reaping the rewards of an amazing date.

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