Anxiety

Trying Not To Freak Out: Update

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A few days ago I had a massive panic attack. You can read this post to fill you in. Basically, I got blood work done last week. On Wednesday, they called me in saying it was nothing serious, but my doctor wanted to see me. “Nothing serious” translated into “you’re dying” for me and I absolutely freaked out. 

So, it’s Wednesday morning, I’m home alone, and I am convinced I’ll be dead within 24 hours. First, I call my mom. She’s a teacher and I know she’ll be home. I pick up the phone and it almost goes to voicemail before my brother picks up. Mom’s in the shower. Great. Eventually she answers and I tell her the news. She’s a little surprised that they even called me back about the blood work which in turn freaks me out even more.

“Why are you surprised?! Do you think there’s something wrong with me? I’m obviously dying.”

Mom offers to drive me to the doctor. My appointment is in an hour. In the meantime, I call Jeff. I start bawling. I can’t even control  how many tears are exploding out of my eye sockets. He’s so worried he offers to leave work immediately and meet me at the doctors. I’m sure I made it seem like a much bigger deal over the phone…considering how much I was crying.

Aaaanyway, we get to the doctors at 11. Jeff is already there, sitting in the waiting room. I try to hold it together but tears still spring out of my eyes. At 11:10, we get called in to see the doctor. At 11:20, my doctor enters the room.

“So,” She starts. “I wanted to talk to you about your blood test. It’s nothing serious, so don’t worry.”
Enter, me. Still worried.
“Everything looks normal, your blood sugar, your iron, your (some weird long name that I can’t remember) is also fine.”
“Oh.” I feel pretty stupid now, because the main thing I was worried about was my blood sugar.
“There is one minor thing. Your stomach bacterial level is approximately .30 higher than usual. But keep in mind, we get worried when it’s 100 over. So, really, we’ll just keep an eye on it and see if anything changes.”
“Oh.”
I can feel Jeff desperately holding in a laugh.
“How’s your anxiety?” My doctor asks.
“Uh…well this morning I was kind of freaking out because of this appointment.”
“Didn’t you get the message?” She asks. “I told the receptionist to say ‘it’s nothing serious’ so that you wouldn’t be anxious! Did you not get the message?”

At this point, there’s probably nothing in the world that could make me feel more stupid.

“Uh…yup. I got the message. Still freaked out.”

SO YEAH. That was my extremely eventful yet extremely uneventful doctor’s appointment. Jeff is still making fun of me for it.

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